One sentence which probably many singles get to hear from their friends is: “Stop looking for the perfect woman/man!“. Well, sorry, but I never said that I am looking for the perfect woman.
It’s a big mistake/misunderstanding. I think many friends think that, when you are a bit longer single, you are looking for something perfect. The perfect match with the perfect partner. They are afraid that you are looking for something which doesn’t exist or which you never will get.
It is nice that they care, but they are wrong.
I am not looking for a perfect woman – I am looking for the right woman. That is a difference.
A perfect woman – perfect match – would be very boring, I believe. First of all is that really hard to find (if any way possible). And then imagine someone on which you can’t explore anything, because you know already everything. Your partner would think like you, would have the same hobbies, the same feelings, would like the same food, the same drinks, the same taste of music, movies and would have the same interests. Never differences or other opinions. I mean 100% the same. What would be interesting about it. Sure, 100% harmony. No discussions about nothing. Always the same opinion. It’s not possible to find it and I am not sure if that would be an fulfilled relationship.
But what means then “right woman” (for me)? The right woman is the woman which makes me happy (more then everybody else). Who gives me the feeling that I don’t want to miss her anymore in my live… even more, with which I want to share the rest my life. With which I can imagine to sit even with 80 years on a park bench next to each other. A woman who shares many of my preferences. A woman with which I can and I want to talk about everything. A woman I want to love… because I think she deserve it.
It sounds like a perfect match. But the difference is that she don’t need to be perfect. Every human has his own opinions. Maybe she has another taste of music. Well, ok, I can live with it. That is the thing… to find someone who is different, but still fit. Not the taste of music or food or drinks or whatever makes love. The whole person is important.
It will not fit if we have nothing in common… that is for sure. But not everything has to fit.
It sounds confusing, I know. But I believe you know what I mean.
The most important is the feeling I have when I am with someone together (from the first moment). If I feel good with her, then it is a great start. If we can talk… let’s go on. If I like her smell and how it feels to feel her… If I like her personality… almost in love. … These things.
I mean you don’t meet someone and ask “What is your favorite band?” … “Metallica” … “Oh sorry, I like Guns’n’Roses. We don’t fit. Ciao” … That is not how it works.
There are things which need to fit and others which don’t need. And everybody has his own opinion about what need to fit and what not. Everybody has other priorities.
My most important one is how I feel when we are together. If I don’t feel good and happy… then is it lost case. That’s why I need to meet her in real (even we meet here in the internet) to make a real decision about if I could love her or not.
As I said on the main page already. This webpage is make the first contact… nothing else. I need to see, smell, touch, talk, etc. That are the things which really matters and connect.
To make a conclusion (before I totally get off the subject ). The “right woman” is not perfect! But in my eyes she is perfect enough that I want to spend my whole life with her.
What do you think?